It may be a strange coincidence that this happened the night after bottling the JaegerSquirrel, but not even the officer in charge believed that. When pulling into the driveway, a small black figure flew by, forcing the officer to ram into the curb (true story). We didn't find out how the officer explained this to his superiors, but I would imagine he'll keep what he saw that night to himself.It is believed that the JaegerSquirrel thought the stolen computer was the sole source of the media frenzy caused by the publicizing of the creature. Let's hope this satisfies him. Luckily the brew crew member was not at home at the time of the robbery. However, a 30 pound Possum was not so lucky. Its ravaged carcass was found not more than 20 ft from the house- a sign of a truly infuriated beast.
Why do we get knocked down? So we can learn to get back up again. We will never again mock the existence of this creature, I recommend you do the same.
4 comments:
As I told the police, I honestly don't know what happened that night. I remember there being a loud commotion followed by shattering glass, but nothing out of the ordinary. Also, I'm pretty sure my son was watching Rocky and Bullwinkle, because at one point he ran into the kitchen screaming about some flying squirrel with red eyes and antlers. Again, nothing out of the ordinary. However, now that I think about it, there is one thing that sticks out. Don't tell anyone, but I usually grab a beer before I sneak a skinny dip in the neighbors' hot tub. On Saturday night, however, I noticed their mini-fridge was empty. Now that is out of the ordinary!
Keep your son away from the windows and put the offering out each night and you should live. However, if I ever catch you taking mine, oops, I mean Skye's beer out of the fridge again I will invoke the power of the JaegerSquirrel on you.
Also, I now see why we need video equipment in the back yard.
Interesting to me that the squirrel in question only has one red eye... perhaps the confusion of the moment threw the detectives off the trail?
The real question is: why do squirrels and possums have a natural hate for each other?
The one red eye was to accurately reflect the image seen by eyewitnesses, which was only side views of this "creature". The horn descriptions were so out of whack and impossible (horns on a squirrel?) that we elected not to include them in the sketch. Please contact us immediately if you see the suspect @ 555-5785.
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